Yeeeaaa, well. Where to begin? Yuumi that furry fiend. Mega pain, no fun and whoever picks her might have lost control over their lives. That's how it is, and you can't deny it. Playing against Yuumi is like stepping on Lego. Just over and over in a short period of time... While the pieces get sharper and the pain increases. Why all the hate, you may ask yourselves? I will give you the five reasons why I think, Yuumi should be deleted from the game!
Remember that interview when Riot answered whether they think that Yuumi is balanced or not with a simple 'no'. Doesn't that say it all? Imagine designing a champion and totally losing track of its balancing and harm it causes to... ME! There even is a petition on change.org which wants Yuumi to be removed from the game. See guys? I'm not the only one who wants this to happen and gets queasy in the stomach area when thinking about Yuumi. Delete her from the game already, Riot!
- Ever wondered how much money you spend the last couple of years for your precious skins? Here we have the answer, if you can stand it.
But since this is a column with a journalistic foundation, I will keep my integrity for now. Loving to rant about cats and all, but now let us get to the straight facts why Yuumi sucks.
1. Yuumi sucks because: The Gameplay is not Interactive
What Yuumi's gameplay is about? Glue yourself to your ADC or any fed ally afterwards. Throw some autoattacks every once in a while and heal your allies from time to time – while sticking to them, of course. No worries, they will do the moving for you and recalling for you and farm your experience. Feeling like a mechanical god already? Go watch a series while climbing then, that's what Yuumi's like.
2. Yuumi sucks because: The Toxic Submarine
Ever heard about the toxic submarine? That's when Twitch and Yuumi unite. It's brutal. Remember the gluing mechanic of Yuumi? Well, if she glues herself to Twitch and the rat goes stealth mode, Yuumi simply follows. Yes, you heard right – 2 invisible furries for the price of one. And Yuumi has quite a few of such broken mechanics which totally makes no sense and at the same time, empower her kit even more. Imagine getting surprised by not only a hyper carry, but her rooting, healing cat friend as well. Gross.
3. Yuumi sucks because: She is invincible
If you're mad about this point, then well done. You're on the correct side of the rift – the one Yuumi isn't on. She's a freaking healbot, so it's hard enough to kill any of her teammates at all. But herself? Don't even think about it. As long as any of her allies is near her, when the first one dies, she will just jump to them in no time. Like a blood sucking tick. But instead of their blood, Yuumi sucks yours. And with it, your whole soul because that's what Yuumi players do.
You still haven't learned how to play Akshan? Well, get to it, then!
4. Yuumi sucks because: She isn't for a solo session
Yuumi can't stand on her own feet. Bound to an ally, she can't do A N Y T H I N G on her own. Most likely the devilish cat will stick to her ADC like a piece of gum. Playing the shield bot game, while pressing E for heals once in a while. Be right back, to grab a drink and snacks? No problem, won't be impactful, since you play Yuumi anyway.
5. Yuumi sucks because: Furries have no place in Summoner's Rift
We have the perfect idea for an event, which takes place with Norra coming into the game. Since she's Yuumi´s master, the event could be all about a fight between them. In the end, Norra gets her book back and banishes Yuumi into a different realm. And woosh, Yuumi is gone, Norra implemented ,and it all makes sense lore wise. You're welcome, Riot!
- We almost got Norra, but then the new Champion was Vex and not Norra. Sadge.
Why that? You shouldn't need to ask that anymore, common. Summoner's Rift is a battlefield for heroes and monster, not for little furries. Get off, Yuumi!